More Jessica-isms

Things Jessica has said within the past month….  
If only I was able to keep track of all the crazy things she has said
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“I was in the bathroom for a long time because I did the number 2, but the watery kind.”
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JESSICA: Why didn’t we go anywhere today?
ME: Because I’m sick
JESSICA: (in a VERY irritated voice) We’ll then I took a bath for NOTHING!

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As I’m combing my hair, Jessica cracks up laughing and as she points she says,…
“Ha ha ha, You have old lady hair!” (talking about my gray hair)
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JESSICA: Can I take a Shath in my underwear? (Shath is what she calls a bath with the shower running )
ME: Why would you want to do that?
JESSICA: Well so my butt doesn’t get wet
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I have a headache on the side of my head. But it feels like it’s banging around in there. Or maybe it’s my brain trying to break out.
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(Jessica telling me not to get water from the water cooler in my kitchen)
DON’T get water from there because it taste like fish are peeing in there!
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JESSICA: I want to fight with you.
ME: No- I don’t feel like it right now.
JESSICA:  (very disappointed) Ahhhhh!!! But what if I promise not to beat you up again?
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Jessica was upset because I wouldn’t let her stay up late to watch the Cardinals game.
But MOM! It’s not fair because I haven’t seen the Cardinals for a LONG time since I was little.”
Funny coming from a 6 yr old 
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JESSICA: Mom, you look very ugly in that shirt.
ME: That’s not very nice.
JESSICA: Well! But you do!
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At dinner Jessica looks down at her dinner plate and says,
“It smells like stink, but I’ll eat it anyway”     HA HA
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Throughout the day I called my youngest daughter by my oldest daughters name….
“Ande, bring that to me,”  “Ande, “move out of the way”, “Ande, go brush your teeth”.
Jessica then says….
“Mom, it’s ok if you’re calling me Ande, I know you mean me but you’re old and just don’t remember who we are.

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Jessica was changing her clothes and says,
“Don’t look at my front butt or else I’m gonna pee on you!” Ha ha ha ha ha!
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Me to Jessica: If someone ever gives you a gift and you don’t like it, you still have to pretend and say thank you.
Ande to Jessica: Yeah you have to be nice and not say you don’t like it. So what will you say when you don’t like a gift?
Jessica: Will you please take it back and me something I like?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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And my favorite is Jessica talking to our dog….

“If you ever see chocolate on the floor, don’t eat it because it’s bad for you. And also don’t eat it because it could be poop. So don’t ever eat poop, because I did that once and it was nasty. So don’t ever eat chocolate off the floor – okay Payson?  (here’s the story about poop)